Oh, it’s swimsuit time.

I think most people can relate to feeling nervous or embarrassed [or terrified] about putting on a swimsuit and revealing our flesh suit to the world. And, contrary to popular belief, this issue plagues all genders. It’s not picky. As if somehow everyone has x-ray telepathy and knows the one or three areas we are […]

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Day 30 of 30: IT BETTER BE GOOD.

I have effectively avoided writing this post for two days. Why? Because I want it to be good. “Thirty days of focusing on self-love and having multiple breakthroughs, Jen. What are you going to tell your audience of 16 people? THEY AWAIT YOUR BRILLIANCE. This is the final day and should be a culmination of […]

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Day 21 of 30: Fun is where the freedom is + the power of rejection

External validation has been a big drug for me. The responses of others could lift me up or crush me in an instant. What’s funny is that these comments from people are just in passing. It’s not important or life-changing for them. They probably never think about it again. Meanwhile, I’ve deleted social media before […]

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Day 20 of 30: Wherever you go, there you are.

I remember the ride back from the airport. My parents picked me up after a three week trip to England. They funded the flight for me and hoped I’d find some relief there. I did, but not in the way they’d hoped. “I discovered something amazing,” I told them. “What’s that?” “I was still depressed […]

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Day 18 of 30: the freedom of realizing how tiny we are

Very little is the end of the world. Focus is an amazing thing. The mind can take a tiny detail and zoom in so tightly that it seems giant. This is how a minor annoyance can overtake our awareness and, for instance, overcome deep love for a person. It’s about what we choose to focus […]

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Day 17 of 30: On doing the scary thing

“Thunder thighs.” “Tree trunk legs.” “Why do you waddle like that?” “Your ass isn’t as nice as it looks.” “Your thighs are so big.” “You have such tiny knees for such big legs.” … I’d like to say that these were easy comments to forget… That the multitude of compliments I received outweighed these stinging […]

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Day 13 of 30: It’s okay to not be okay.

It’s okay for you to not be at your A game. As my boyfriend says, “You can’t always be a super hero. Let me help carry the burden during your in-between times.” And that’s what we do for each other in partnerships and friendships. Part of taking care of ourselves means giving ourselves permission to […]

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DAY ELEVEN: On doing the thing you’re avoiding

May, Myself, and I: A Self-Love Experiment DAY ELEVEN: On doing the thing you’re avoiding. One of my favorite exercises when I’m feeling squirrelly and discontent is to make a list of all the shit that’s stressing me out or that I’ve been avoiding or need to do. I just brain dump it all onto […]

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DAY TEN: Give yourself permission to be bad at something.

My whole life I’ve wanted to learn to fight. I’d watch The Matrix
and be like, “I wish I could fight like Trinity.” And then go back to reading books or doodling. For decades I longed to get back into martial arts but was too afraid of the awkward learning phase. Finally, at the age of 31, I decided to give it a try…

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DAY NINE: share + let the light in

May, Myself, & I: A Self-Love Experiment DAY NINE: You’re not a burden. 5/10/2019 “You’re here to spread god’s message,” a friend once told me. “You’re like a lioness standing on a mountaintop, here to roar.” I smiled and thanked them. They continued, “How funny that when you get to a down place-a place of […]

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