Overcoming the inevitable “Oh fuck…” point in EVERY creative project

When I get commissioned for a painting, I feel thrilled. Excited. Eager to start. I purchase the supplies necessary and may even watch a YouTube tutorial to make sure my skills are fine-tuned and ready to go. I think about the painting a lot before I do it. I feel giddy. And then I go […]

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the importance of telling on ourselves

Earlier today, I was caught in a trance. Self-doubt, insecurity, fear, and an overall downward and inward spiral. I felt sad about my living situation, my job, the fact that the residual stuff from Breast Implant Illness impacts my mental clarity. I felt down about my overall life. I felt like a failure. Like a […]

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Day 97 of 365: just for me.

I’ve had an item on my to-do list for months. Paint a painting, just for me. The rules around it are that I CANNOT SELL THE PAINTING. I’ve done this thing in the past where I’d paint something for myself, and it’d be awesome, and I’d share it on the internets, and people would want […]

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Day 27 of 365: avoidance, synthesis, and diving in

A professor came to me in a dream last night. I’d never met him before, and yet he felt familiar. He returned a book of my poetry to me. I expected an A. Instead, he told me to redo it. He said he could tell it was rushed, and that it needed more color. There […]

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