What I’m afraid to say is…

Sometimes I take things too literally. I’ll hear a statement like “your thoughts and words become your reality” and take it so seriously that I’ll become a hyper-vigilant micro-manager of my thoughts and words and actions. I’ll run everything through a filter. I’ll always be “on.” To an extent, this awareness can be helpful in […]

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5 years of sobriety & 5 miracles

April 5, 2014 was my last drink. It was a swig of Grey Goose right out of the bottle, at around 9AM. Since then, some of the most amazing and magical blessings have come into my life. I mean, it took a shit pile of work to take an honest look at myself, clear out […]

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What Bob Ross told me about Right vs. Wrong

I can often paralyze myself with hyper-analysis around the right or wrong thing to do in any given situation. It’s draining and exhausting and annoying. My boyfriend made me this awesome cross stitch of Bob Ross. It sits on my altar space[1] next to a chipped mini statue of Buddha’s head and some stones and […]

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the surprising emotional support skills of a rubber ducky

I once upon a time dated a quantum physicist who was also a computer programmer. The quantum physicist part isn’t at all relevant to this post. I just like saying “quantum” and “physics” together, because I feel smart. Onward! He talked about a trick some programmers use. They keep a rubber ducky on their desk. […]

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the importance of telling on ourselves

Earlier today, I was caught in a trance. Self-doubt, insecurity, fear, and an overall downward and inward spiral. I felt sad about my living situation, my job, the fact that the residual stuff from Breast Implant Illness impacts my mental clarity. I felt down about my overall life. I felt like a failure. Like a […]

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getting my deep rest on

Sometimes I burn out. I’ll feel excited, find a strand of inspiration, and then hold on tight for dear life while getting flailed around in the wind. Like a kite. Or like a surfer on a wave. I’ll ride it until I crash. And then keep holding on. I’ve become aware of this tendency. I’ve […]

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Oh, it’s swimsuit time.

I think most people can relate to feeling nervous or embarrassed [or terrified] about putting on a swimsuit and revealing our flesh suit to the world. And, contrary to popular belief, this issue plagues all genders. It’s not picky. As if somehow everyone has x-ray telepathy and knows the one or three areas we are […]

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Day 30 of 30: IT BETTER BE GOOD.

I have effectively avoided writing this post for two days. Why? Because I want it to be good. “Thirty days of focusing on self-love and having multiple breakthroughs, Jen. What are you going to tell your audience of 16 people? THEY AWAIT YOUR BRILLIANCE. This is the final day and should be a culmination of […]

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Day 29 of 30: On wanting more.

She had always wanted more. More than she had. More than she thought possible. More than she thought she deserved. More than others said feasible. She wanted more. She spent each minute planning, analyzing, digging, and hoping to find what she was looking for. She was deeply dedicated and hardworking. She assumed this made her […]

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