I can hear the birds again. (A description of journeying through depression.)

I can hear birds again. Outside, they’re chirping. It’s subtle and crisp and beautiful. I can hear the breeze and feel it on my skin. It rustles the changing leaves and whisks a few of them onto a windy ride to the earth’s floor. I can see the sky. I’ve viewed it previously, but today […]

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Stop driving yourself crazy trying to do the “right” things

There’s no way to know what to do. Where to go. What to say, to whom. There’s no way to really know what’s “right”. Sure; there’s the moment-to-moment gut instincts. But even those aren’t always reliable… Since fear can oftentimes mask itself as intuitive guidance. I often feel like we are our own labyrinths to […]

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“But does it really matter?” — a question / answer attitude adjustment

Over the last five and a half years, I’ve worked to remove distractions / baggage / stagnant energy / old beliefs and focused on learning to use my intuition. That tiny, raspy whisper has become louder and easier to decipher. Rather than occasionally hearing it, I have more of an ongoing conversation with this sense […]

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What I’m afraid to say is…

Sometimes I take things too literally. I’ll hear a statement like “your thoughts and words become your reality” and take it so seriously that I’ll become a hyper-vigilant micro-manager of my thoughts and words and actions. I’ll run everything through a filter. I’ll always be “on.” To an extent, this awareness can be helpful in […]

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5 years of sobriety & 5 miracles

April 5, 2014 was my last drink. It was a swig of Grey Goose right out of the bottle, at around 9AM. Since then, some of the most amazing and magical blessings have come into my life. I mean, it took a shit pile of work to take an honest look at myself, clear out […]

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What Bob Ross told me about Right vs. Wrong

I can often paralyze myself with hyper-analysis around the right or wrong thing to do in any given situation. It’s draining and exhausting and annoying. My boyfriend made me this awesome cross stitch of Bob Ross. It sits on my altar space[1] next to a chipped mini statue of Buddha’s head and some stones and […]

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the surprising emotional support skills of a rubber ducky

I once upon a time dated a quantum physicist who was also a computer programmer. The quantum physicist part isn’t at all relevant to this post. I just like saying “quantum” and “physics” together, because I feel smart. Onward! He talked about a trick some programmers use. They keep a rubber ducky on their desk. […]

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the importance of telling on ourselves

Earlier today, I was caught in a trance. Self-doubt, insecurity, fear, and an overall downward and inward spiral. I felt sad about my living situation, my job, the fact that the residual stuff from Breast Implant Illness impacts my mental clarity. I felt down about my overall life. I felt like a failure. Like a […]

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