DAY ELEVEN: On doing the thing you’re avoiding

May, Myself, and I: A Self-Love Experiment

DAY ELEVEN: On doing the thing you’re avoiding.

One of my favorite exercises when I’m feeling squirrelly and discontent is to make a list of all the shit that’s stressing me out or that I’ve been avoiding or need to do. I just brain dump it all onto notebook paper or into a Word document.

The exercise of writing it out is immensely helpful. You know what’s even better? Beginning to take care of the things I’ve been avoiding.

I’ve found that the amount of resistance (or whiny “I DON’T WANNNAAAA”) I feel toward a task is inversely proportional to the amount of freedom I experience from accomplishing it.

At the beginning of this month, upon deciding to embark on this 30-day Self-Love experiment I’ve called “May, Myself, and I”, I made such a list. One by one, I’ve been going through and taking care of business.

What’s funny is that most of the items take, like, 15 minutes. Meanwhile I’ve spent 15 weeks (or months) actively avoiding what could have been accomplished in under a half hour. Cute.

First, I went through my clothes. I do this every three or so months to narrow down to the clothes I wear, and to pass on the items I haven’t worn in a while. Clothes want to be worn! They want to be shown off! They don’t want to sit in my drawers collecting dust and smelling stagnant. I reached out to a local shelter and set up a pick-up date for May 16th. This means other folks will be able to get regular use and joy out of the items that’ve been sitting untouched in my wardrobe.

Marie Kondo would be proud. (See her book at the bottom of this post.)

Next, I went through my paperwork. What had started as a pile of a couple “I’ll get to that later” items became a disorganized heap which overwhelmed me any time I walked past it.

And so… I bought a cool fireproof organizer thingy. I made tabs. I sat on the floor with all the paper strewn about, and I went through it.

Less than 30 minutes, folks. Something I’d avoided for six months. Done in 30 minutes.

Oh, the relief! The lift! I felt like such an adult!

Next was a bookcase. It hadn’t been dusted in six or more months and the books where falling all over themselves.

I took everything off the shelf, touching and cleaning and thanking each item, and then organized it all on newly-cleaned shelves. This entire process took about 45 minutes. I’ve spent 10x that stressing over how badly I needed to clean the bookcase.

And remember the ring I posted about in DAY ONE? I sold it! To a lovely woman who will give it a great home. That ring sat unworn for eight years! Letting it go and blessing it on its new journey felt immensely freeing.

Letting go of what no longer serves us allows those items (and the emotions surrounding them) to be transmuted into something new, fresh, and beautiful.

What is something you’ve promised yourself that you’ve yet to do? What is something you’re avoiding? What action can you take RIGHT NOW to gain some momentum?


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Some days, I paint. Other days, I write. And rap. And tell stories. And do comedy. And doodle. And [attempt to] bake. And, one week out of every month, I merge with my sofa and sob about mortality and things like the existence of air and how we can't live without it and how utterly claustrophobic that is to consider. I'm relatively particular. And this is a place for me to share ALL the quirks.

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